So right now I’m trying to type this reflection away all in the whilst my shift is beginning to turn into a bit of a natural disaster. Multitasking has never really been a thing for me, but at the same time being a people please for the suspected majority of my childhood, I’ve found that multitasking has become a bit more of a coping mechanism than anything I would actually swear by.
This song that I’ve now been working on for almost two days is really starting to turn into something special, but I have to be honest and admit that I might be getting a little ahead of myself. Am I supposed to feel like this is going to be one of the greatest things I’ve ever written?
Furthermore to that point, does it feel right to assume or believe that this will go down in history as one of the strongest pieces of writing ever recorded in hip hop? This is where delusion could take a deafening choke hold.
The thing is I’ve been delusional before, and in many instances today I’m still highly delusional behind a lot of the stuff that I do because I have to be, but I think there’s a clear distinction between healthy delusion, and toxic delusion. The entire internet has seen what delusion did to Fousey Tube, and despite how greatly he believed himself, he was way too far out of touch to accomplish whatever perspective of success he had imagined in his own mind.
I’m choosing to see this piece that I’m working on is going to be a memento of just how far willing I am to showcase that I am aiming for the highest position I can reach in this game of hip hop.
Do I wish this would be recognised by some of the greatest legends that have ever graced the mic? Yes, and I can choose to believe that one day that will happen, but I have to synchronise myself with the reality that may also play out in its place.
I choose to believe that I am already great, a degree of great that I choose to improve on out of the love I have for this craft, and the insight it provides me into learning who I truly am, and who I am truly becoming.
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