So last night, as I was about to go to fall asleepI found myself on my phone oddly at a point In which I normally wouldn’t bother to engage with it.
A music network group on Instagram was live and for some reason my curiosity got the best of me. Before I knew it I was on this platform with 22 other viewers as different people were showcasing their songs.
I thought to myself lemme just sit here for a minute and enjoy the show, but suddenly I felt this nervous surge to jump on and have a go myself. This was really weird because I specifically recall psyching myself out of it as soon as I told myself I’m just here to observe, and yet for some reason I found my finger hovering over the request to join live button.
Before I knew it my heart was in my throat because I pushed the button and suddenly my request to join was accepted, and I was live with these two dudes whom I’ve never met before.
I knew what song I wanted to perform but my God was I still sitting there thinking it wasn’t going to happen. That’s literally the weirdest part of the experience, the fact that it took my brain a long while to register the reality that I was literally about to perform despite my minds efforts to excuse me from doing it.
As a matter of fact I’m pretty sure I was still trying to convince myself to do it another time even though I was midway through performance.
I was properly bothered by the fact that nothing about what I was going to do was rehearsed or perfect, but I told myself I was going to throw my all into it, and let the moment be whatever it will turn out to be.
Before I knew it I was rapping away, trying my best not to stumble over my own lyrics which I miraculously managed to remember pretty well.
I have no idea how I did it, but I was extremely glad that I did because now, I want to do it all over again, and I think this might become a new routine of mine.
I never know where things like this will lead me, but I’m guided by this confident sense that it’s going to put my name out there.
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