One of the things that I’ve seldom written about since the roll out of my daily reflection series is my anger. It’s a little frustrating to write about it because up until now I never really acknowledged the importance of it, the need for me to write about my emotions. This is because I never imagined in a million years that I would have to write about it: Anger simply hasn’t been a part of my life for quite some time.
Still though I must admit that during the years where a lot of anger was present within me, it was BAD, and it was by far one of the most expensive emotions that I ever had to manage. I found myself out of control with my thoughts and my feelings.
I would say right from the age of 13/14 up until the age of 19/21, I was finding it really difficult to live with my anger. There were so many things that I grew to learn and understand that made me feel betrayed. What can I say I’m naive and I’m easily fooled, not because I’m stupid but because I want to see the good in people. I want to see the good in people so much so that I would ignore the bad EVEN though I’m VERY well aware that the bad is there, and my God do I often find that the bad that’s there is PLENTY in abundance.
I went through a cycle where my anger raged on because I felt as though the wool was pulled over my eyes. I was tricked into believing it’s beneficial to be a good person when really…it isint. Sure you get a lovely feeling that sits in your stomach but you become open to being taken advantage of.
This made me extremely angry, and between 21 and 26 that anger subsided, but now I can feel that anger coming back harder than I’ve ever experienced it. I thought I was over it, but it turns out that some old habits really do die hard.
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