Sunday the 5th of May 2024 and my oh my sometimes I have to be careful with what I wish for you know yesterday it was all about being fully energized and having the strength and the confidence to persevere through whatever challenge I
I may face and today it's very much about me swallowing my pride, swallowing my ego and swallowing a little bit of humble pie because I've been hit with a situation that has knocked me completely off my feet and for a lack of a better way of putting it, has put me in a complete state of disarray.
Now, without going too deeply into it, although to be fair this is a situation that has been boiling up for quite some time, and this is just another symptom of, you know, the situation that has been boiling up for quite some time. I'm in a position where I am going to get me anywhere when it comes to my music. This is single-handedly one of the most frustrating things that I've ever had to go through in my personal life. Before becoming a father and my struggle and my frustration was always having to please the desires of my parents
when it came to my career and when it came to my future whilst at the same time having to meet the demands and meet the thirst, you know, kind of like a, you know, feed the thirst that I had within myself for becoming a rap artist. Unfortunately in that situation it was always my parents that came first because it was just the way in which I could remain harmonious with them without having to compromise on our relationship. It's a pretty difficult thing to live your life growing up as a teenager, not getting the support from your parents because they do not understand
and I use that word as accurately as I possibly can, they do not understand the well, you know how deep the well goes when it comes to how passionate you know I am or I was, maybe yeah how passionate I am about this thing that I want to do and you know now, it's the inverse effect has occurred.
I've put myself in a situation where I have become a father. And I am now in, you know, I am now a partner, a long-term partner. And it's those two elements that are now conflicting with my desire to become an artist. The thing is, is that I've never given myself a chance to pursue this thing and I've realised that I only do have one life and the only thing that I will leave behind I guess is my memories, my thoughts, my feelings. I do not want to die with the regret of not having manifested that dream that I always knew I could bring to life.
And so with that being said, I'm just trying to compartmentalize myself as I navigate through this difficult course. There is going to be a day, no matter how distant it is from now, where there will literally be nothing that can get in my way anymore. I will soar through the horrible clouds that I've had to sail my way through or fly through whatever you want to call it and I will be clear of it. I will be clear of the chains that have held me back and the things that have kept me underwater when it comes to the definition of who I truly am.
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