This is probably not going to be the warmest reflection out of everything that I have produced thus far. Sometimes I find it difficult to strike the balance between conjuring something that is positive, valuable, and something that is brutally honest.
I want to use this very platform to be as open as I can be about my day to day thoughts, and sometimes that means having to dive a little deeper into how I'm really feeling. I can't quite explain why, but as of late I've been feeling pretty neurotic, and in other words the rendition/outlook that I have about my life isn't marrying up with what reality is presenting me, and as a result Im getting myself down.
I must admit there are some days where I find myself feeling deeply unhappy, and no matter what I do to try and lighten my mood, it feels as though I am habitually reminding myself of the reasons why I shouldn't bother with carrying on in the first place.
I am trying to move on from the things that I have no other way of describing other than the realisations that have broken my heart. The truth on the other hand is that the process is far easier said than done.
The pain that often leads me to feel so negatively about life is that I have been sold a series of dreams right from the very moment that I drew my first breath, and the reality is that people are very much out here for themselves whilst they are expecting you to be out there for them.
This upsets me because often at times I find that I am the only person who is aware of how deeply selfish we can actually be, and the moment I begin to look out for myself and my own interest, is the moment where people around me begin to get offended.
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