Okay, Wednesday the 3rd of June 2024 and yeah, like I don't even know how to kind of like, you know, begin with this reflection if I'm being honest. Like again, I'm kind of like been battling a couple of episodes. By episodes I'm talking about depressive episodes. Now again,
I want to be very careful when I talk about depression because like, you know, that, you know, that the word depression in this day and age is loaded with a bunch of connotations that might not necessarily apply to each and every individual.
It's actually like a bit of a buzzword nowadays, because again, what does it actually mean to have depression? What does it mean to be depressed? And again, that word in itself, that question in itself will effectively kind of like render a bunch of different answers even within the discourse that is kind of like being carried by the experts in this field. So like when I say that the you know what is it that's kind of like you know been stimulating or what is it that what is the source of my depressive episode? I would say that it's the realization
that I do not have enough time and enough energy to commit to both of the you know to all of the instances that you know that I care about. So the instance of being a father and a partner, the instance of effectively kind of like being an artist. Like one, you know, both instances, all instances effectively kind of like have more of a demand than what I can supply when it comes to kind of like, you know, across the board. Like, you know, I've been kind of like paying a lot of
attention to my music as of late, trying to get my song to get as many views as possible, trying to kind of like connect with people and I'm realizing that I'm kind of like working with one hand tied behind my back because of how busy that I am. Already through my networking and through me trying to put myself out there, I've met two people that already want to work with me. People want to connect with me, people want to speak with me and it's just kind of like I'm in the middle of trying to put my kids to bed or put my
house in order or think about where I'm going to get money from now that I no longer have a job and people want to work with me. So that's kind of like what's been part of my depressive episode, so to speak. But I don't know. It's kind of like a great puzzle, a puzzle that needs to basically kind of be untangled, figured out. And I guess the only way I can actually navigate my way through this complexity is just by basically taking it one step at a time.
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