I often flood my head with countless thoughts about the things I’m doing, so much so to the point I start to suffer from analysis paralysis: being unable to make a decision because I’m overthinking things over and over.
Rarely do I find my mind is still, and I’m not sure if this is because I enjoy being active, or whether I’m simply afraid to exist in a moment where my mind is doing nothing.
It’s like me with swimming. As much as I hate to admit this I’m not a fully competent swimmer. I mean sure I can swim from one point to another, but I can never tread water in the middle of a pool; in other words if I stop swimming I drown.
I think that’s a pretty decent description of what I fear will happen if I stop thinking, that something bad will happen like maybe I’ll forget something important.
This won’t be the easiest habit to shake off since I’m in this transition period between consumer and prosumer; employee to entrepreneur.
I know somewhere along this process it will benefit me massively to think less thoughts and think thoughts more efficiently, but for now my naturally overactive mind is simply responding to all the things I need to bear in mind for the future I’m trying to build.
See that’s the issue when you want to be an entrepreneur, and the blessing when all you want to be an employee: you don’t have to think about much, most of the heavy lifting is done for you and all you have to do is turn up on time and you’ll get paid whether the business does well or not.
You get told where to go and get told what to do, but being an entrepreneur you have to pave your own way, map your own direction , work to your own pace and rhythm, without anyone’s say so.
It’s gonna be interesting to see where I end up in all of this chaos and confusion that I find within the own confinements of my mind. Hopefully I’ll end up somewhere comfortable, where I can confidently pay my bills, follow my passions and let my music ring true everyday.
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